You're making a joke!

[Shifty Eyes]

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 23:42:29 -0500

I waited until most of you have gone to sleep to whip out some of my favorite Christmas music. Who would've thought that an atheist like myself would prefer Christmas music about Jesus?

1-10 Handel_ Messiah - For Unto Us A Child Is Born

Eileen Farrell, Martha Lipton, Etc.; Eugene Ormandy: Philadelphia Orchestra, Mormon Tabernacle Choir

That's the one that's the most fun to sing in a choir. Then again, everything from Messiah was a trip to perform with an orchestra. I can't exactly mention Handel's Messiah without including the Hallelujah Chorus. It's a great piece and I'll always love it.

2-11 Handel_ Messiah, HWV 56 - Hallelujah Chorus

Eileen Farrell, Martha Lipton, Etc.; Eugene Ormandy: Philadelphia Orchestra, Mormon Tabernacle Choir

Now let's focus on the true hero of this day. Oh look, he's headed my way!

To all of my Vox neighbors, friends and family I hope you find a bit of peace and even some joy this holiday weekend. It's been a tough year for a lot of us and I know many of us won't be spending the holidays with those we love the most. My heart especially goes out to those of you who have lost close friends and family in the past year. Love to you all, Val

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Sleepy, Part Deux

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 07:44:15 -0500

I didn't make it to bed until 1:30 again last night. I know some people can handle it, but I can't. Getting up at 6:15 is brutal. Zombie girl. At least last night I was up making delicious cookies and cookie doughs.

My vanilla bean cookie dough and my Mexican Tea Cake dough are in the fridge, ready to be baked tonight. I did finish my sugar spice cookies (a molasses cookie) and my chocolate chip cookies last night.

Yummm...topped with raw sugar.

Delish Molasses Cookie

I had told Cranky about my vanilla bean cookies and I think she said she hadn't seen a vanilla bean (or maybe that was a conversation with someone else). In any event, it's a good excuse to show you my beans (tee hee, that sounds kinda dirty).

The bean itself is sort of waxy and flexible. It doesn't smell like much, but you can almost smell a hint of vanilla.

Ze Bean

Here you can see the delicious and fragrant innards. It's like a gritty, black paste. No those are not giant warts on my thumb, it's flecks of dough.

Gritty Paste

Here is me scraping this bad boy out. After this it got messy 'cause I had six of them to empty.

Scrape

It looks like dirt, I know, but after you mix it, it leaves beautiful speckles evenly throughout the dough. I couldn't get a picture to quite pick that up though.

Dirt Cookies

The dough is then formed into logs and refrigerated. The longer it stays in the fridge, the more vanilla-y it will get. I'll pull it out tonight, slice the logs, bake the cookies and dip them in a chocolate ganache for a cookie that's BETTER than a Pepperidge Farm Milano.

I want to rename my Mexican Tea Cakes to Val's Tea Cakes - not because I'm PC, but because they took a lot of damn work last night. I know I'm not supposed to use my coffee grinder for my nuts, but I always used my cheap old one and it was perfect (besides, I have no problems with mingling the flavors of coffee and pecan). Not thinking that my new grinder is a burr type instead of the kind with blade, I tried to put my pecans through it. It was pushing 1AM, I was not thinking clearly. Mr. Val took over the repairs on the grinder while I chopped and chopped and chopped and chopped until I had a finely ground heap of pecans. Usually my tea cake dough takes me five minutes (and four of those are making the butter and sugar fluffy with a mixer!!), but last night it took a half hour after battling with the grinder (again, stupid on my part, I know).

I left work about two hours early yesterday because I wasn't feeling well. I canceled my therapy session and hit up the grocery store which was mobbed, but it still didn't take me too long. I also stopped and picked up some champagne for Christmas morning Mimosas. Yum. I finally got some saline nasal spray at the grocery store because my nose has been bleeding every day with this cold. After the first squirt I thought it smelled a bit like formaldehyde (yuck) and I got it all over my hands. Upon closer inspection I found the bottle cracked. Well damn. What the hell did I just shoot up my nose? At least I never started hallucinating.

Merry Christmas Eve to you all.

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Monday Bloody Monday

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 07:13:11 -0500

It's back to work for this gal today. Vacation was half out of this world and half a bust. During my second week I ignored obligations, laundry and grocery-buying. I caught a cold and did a lot of sitting on my ass.

Mondays are no fun. ~~I am partially looking forward to going back to work~~. Scratch that. I'm heading right back into busy season and it will be mid April before I can see straight again. I know I have no right to feel this way, but I hate that I'm heading back to work today while someone else who makes my life a lot easier is on vacation this week. I absolutely refuse to begrudge them of their vacation time, but on a purely selfish level I know it will make it a tough week for me. No worries, though, this gal can power through on her own, the long days are only a little more difficult than usual.

I was sad to read yesterday that Brittany Murphy died. I want to know why it is that in all of the articles I've read they all end with Ashton Kutcher's insincere Twitter post about it? I don't get it. He uses things like "2day" in it. Not only does it seem inappropriate for Kutcher, but why on earth is it being quoted by the AP and NPR??? Anyway, back to the matter at hand, Murphy was hilarious in Clueless, but she really shined as Luanne on King of the Hill.

The Infamous Manger Babies

Save your Twin Peaks spoilers, I only have eight episodes to go. I watched one yesterday that scared the crap out of me. Let's just say it involved a certain formerly comatose dickhole who was suddenly awake and wearing a party hat. Ack!!! Scariest moment in the series thus far. I'm at the point where Scully's dad disappeared in the woods and then reappeared during a bad storm. Mary Katherine Gallagher showed up as a case worker for that kid who wanted to be Data. And Agent Fox Mulder busted in and saved my ~~Agent~~ Deputy Cooper. I cannot wait to wrap up the series. And since I am having a delicious blood orange while sipping my fine coffee I'll spin a bit of Freshly Squeezed for y'all this morning.

05 Freshly Squeezed (Instrumental)

Angelo Badalamenti

Dale Cooper: Denise, I would assume you're no longer interested in girls.
Denise Bryson: Coop, I may be wearing a dress, but I still pull my panties on one leg at a time if you know what I mean.
Dale Cooper: Not really.

Send me your good thoughts today as I trudge through what will probably be two whole days of playing catch-up at the office. I can use all the help I can get!

Until tomorrow...have a good one!

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Sniffle

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 19:17:24 -0500

Looks like my Miss Mira is having the same weekend as me.

Dec 09 sick and sleepy

Hang in there, toots, you'll feel better soon. Love, Aunt Val

On a side note, did you notice her head's resting on the diaper? Looks like she's been hitting the bottle like me too!

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Lousy but not Depressed!

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 09:51:42 -0500

Yesterday's brush with depression has passed and now I only feel lousy physically. I'll take it! I wrote yesterday's sad Christmas post shortly after waking from a very depressing dream that really threw off my mood for most of the day. I had dreamed that I went in for my annual lady exam and instead of the usual Pap they waved some device around my fun parts and the doctor looked at me with sad eyes and said, "this is the hardest part of my job, you have a malignant tumor". At first I was all irritated and insisted that a Pap only looks at the cells on my cervix, and wouldn't know if I had a tumor, but apparently their newfangled device could see beyond what a Pap covers. Oh lovely. So I laid on the table and a nurse came in with a box of brochures on cancer and dropped them on my chest and said, "you need to read all of these!". I was more pissed that people wouldn't talk to me about my next step but instead were forcing me to read fucking brochures. I went back to the doctor and insisted they send my blood to a "special" lab where they could confirm the diagnosis because it seemed like a fluke. Anyway, I was still coping with the diagnosis when I woke up...and despite the fact I realized it was a dream, it still had me putting stuff in perspective and had me thinking about what I really wanted out of life. Not exactly a fun way to start the day.

I've been battling this lousy cold. Thank the geeze for the Mucinex and spiced wine, it really cures anything. Of course, I slept beyond my next dosage of Mucinex this morning and have felt dizzy ever since waking up. At least this morning I was dreaming about curling up on someone's couch with a blanket while feeling lousy. Oh, and there were puppies. There was some sort of dog show going on in the room and there were poodles for cuddling (you know, cute poodles that don't have that stupid poodle haircut). It was really quite wonderful even though I was sick. There was a Christmas tree in the corner with little plush monkey ornaments that some of the puppies were trying to get at. There were doberman and German Shepherd puppies playing and it was adorable beyond belief. You can tell I'm pushing 30 now that I'm starting to have puppy aches.

Last night I had a Christmas miracle of sorts when I had Chinese delivered. Yeah, that was the miracle. Still haven't been to the store, but someone brought me a spicy dinner while I was sick, how great is that? I rounded out the evening with a little Back to School. A Rodney Dangerfield movie is the way to go when you're feeling down in the dumps (note to Mariser: keep that in mind the next time you think about watching something awful like Leaving Las Vegas).

I didn't realize how many Star Trek connections there were to Back to School - I had only remembered one. There were a few bit part actors as well - I think Rodney Dangerfield's wife played a Romulan senator once. Robert Picardo, otherwise known as The Doctor on Voyager, played the guy who was sucking face with Dangerfield's wife at their anniversary party. He was wearing leather hammer pants, it was awesome. Sally Kellerman, the one I remembered, was in the second Original Series pilot, Where No Man Has Gone Before, as Dr. Elizabeth Dehner. She's also has this voice you'd recognize anywhere, I think the thing I knew her best for were those Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing commercials. She's probably the reason I love ranch dressing so much. I could let her voice tell me to do anything. Terry Farrell, the bland but beautiful Dax from Deep Space 9 played the son's love interest, Valerie Desmond. Oh my god, did they not make tweezers until the 90's??? I wish I could find a picture online, but it looked like both of her eyebrows were engaged in some sort of bizzare mating ritual with each other. Oh, and last but not least was the unseen Dan Curry. You probably don't know who Danny Curry is, but he designed the opening titles for Back to School. He's probably best known for his extensive work on various Star Trek projects as a visual effects supervisor and a second unit director. There is an awesome special about him on the TNG season 6 dvds where he demonstrates some of the Klingon fighting moves that HE choreographed. Dude, the man is totally at ease with a Bat'leth, it's so cool.

The plot of Back to School leaves a little to be desired, but who cares? My favorite bit? Kurt Vonnegut.

Kurt Vonnegut in Back to School

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Home for the Holidays

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 09:13:32 -0500

1-03 The Christmas Waltz

Not really. It's tough, year after year, not ever spending the holidays with the people I'd really rather be with. I can completely sympathize with the grinchy attitude that has pervaded the neighborhood this year. I feel it every year. Oh, I can put on the best Christmas record in the world, The Carpenter's Christmas Portrait, and listen to Karen's golden voice start singing, "Frosted window panes..." but it only makes me sad and I usually end up crying a little to myself. For a long time I wondered if Christmas had just lost it's magic because I was an adult but I know it's because I'm never with my mom's side of the family.

Mr. Val and I traveled home for Christmas back in 2001 but that was the last time I got to spend the holidays with the fam, and that was a nightmare year. That was the year Mr. Val and I were supposed to land in Moline at 9:30 in the morning and instead, after a day of delays and reroutings we ended up in Cedar Rapids around 9:30 in the evening and had to take a damn taxi all the way to Moline. On top of that, Mr. Val picked up a cold at the airport. By the end of our three day visit my mother and I were barely on speaking terms. It was a very stressful trip. We sort of decided then and there that my visits home would be during more relaxing times of the year so no one would get killed. But I really want to break that promise. I still hate flying in winter. The last time I was home in December was for my grandfather's funeral a few years ago, and while my sister and I did up Christmas together (which was WONDERFUL), the flight home was the worst I've ever been on. It just sucks to travel this time of year. But it would really be worth it if it meant seeing my mom's family at Christmas again.

Traditions

I miss my sister. I miss that I now have a niece experiencing the most magical Christmases of her life. I miss making Christmas goodies with people I love. I miss decorating the tree with only my mom and sister while we sing Christmas carols. I miss my mom letting me sip Bailey's on Christmas Eve (not that she really has to "let" me now and not that I would ever choose to drink that nasty shit, but it's tradition, ya know?). I miss my mom forcing us to state our belief in Santa Claus before distributing gifts on Christmas Eve. I miss peeling shrimp in the kitchen together (and there was that one year she got raw shrimp instead of cooked and I didn't give it any thought before sneaking a piece - barf!). I miss being one of 15 cousins running around my grandmother's house, sticking olives on my fingertips and having burping contests (I know we're all adults now, but that really hasn't stopped anyone, I'm sure of that). I miss the perfect moment of silence when our gigantic family (we're talking around 50 people at this point) is able to gather together for a prayer before hitting the world's most awesome buffet line. I miss Aunt Theresa's oyster casserole. I miss Aunt Mary's taco salad. I miss my mom's scalloped corn. I miss the company of my chaotic and beautiful family. I miss Christmas.

What would a post like this be without the saddest Christmas song ever? Let Karen break your heart and have a listen.

1-06 Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

The Carpenters

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Lame

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 22:24:38 -0500

Had a fun night out with the gals but it's nearly an hour drive and it's always a sober affair. And that's ok, we have a lot of fun just chit chatting, it just eats up five hours to only get to hang for three. Ah well, it had been far to long since our last gathering and it was good to catch up.

I caught the Phantom's home game on the radio on the ride home. I hit the Northway at the beginning of the third period and boy did it suck for us. It was 2-0 Hamilton when I tuned in and it wasn't long before the Bulldogs scored a third point. Then - unbelievably - within 20 seconds of the third point the puck bounced off of one of the Adirondack defensemen's skates and right in the net for a very shitty goal. They ended up losing 4-0 in the end.

Because I haven't followed the team all season I didn't realize this was like their fourth shutout. They have a record-low in the AHL for number of goals this season. They're only at 60-something and 10 of those were against the Penguins last weekend (I saw six of 'em on Saturday!). Sigh. I was born a Cubs fan and I'll die a Cubs fan. I swear, they infect any sport I show interest in. Maybe I just need to go to more games. Since they won so big at my first game, I should be their good luck charm.

Winners

Not so much.

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Grindhaus

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 08:10:38 -0500

Hey, first some good news, have you tried going to vox.com to check out recent comments and updates? For well over a year it's barely loaded, but lately I'd say the page loads 90% of the time without having to reload. Ok, maybe that's an overly optimistic percentage, but the success rate has far exceeded the failure rate. I used to use the recent activity page to stay on top of comments but haven't really tried that in a while since all I ever got was a blank page. While typing this I just tried it and it worked the first time! Woah, folks, might Vox be making a comeback??? Is it possible to restore the greatness that was once our little community?

I went out in yesterday's butt-cold to have lunch with co-worker, S, who has been holding down the fort at the office. I also made it up to a great little gift shop in Lake George I've wanted to go for a while. Got some stuff for my former co-workers who I'm meeting tonight for our Christmas get together. We used to meet monthly - and maintained it for five years after we stopped working together but since moving up North it's been harder for me to get together with them, and you know how these things eventually go. We're such an oddball group. There are only four of us...I'm in my 20's, and we have one each in her 30's, 40's and 50's. It's funny how different we all are, but our shared history brought us together and we still have fun going out. Sadly, D won't be with us, her partner's brother died this week and they have to drive to Chitown for the funeral. Very sad. :-( Not only is it crappy because it's the holiday's, but D's birthday is also on the 25th and it's hard to get happy and celebrate those otherwise fun times when someone has passed away.

While I've got you down here in sad city, remember HJ? He died on Monday. So much for those six months, not that they would've been great anyway...there are some people who don't stick around for the suffering and more power to them...he's been through enough already. Sister is going to the funeral this morning. Keep her in your thoughts, it will be a tough day.

Enough of the sad talk, let's go for the stupid Val talk. Why is it that I over-research the majority of purchases I make for myself and others, making sure it's the absolute perfect thing for me or the gift recipient, but occasionally I'll buy something with no thought whatsoever? Like with certain Christmas gifts, I'll look everywhere online for that perfect something to give someone, make sure it has great product reviews and will be something really useful for the other person. But then I'll go to Target for something that I need for myself and buy something because it's shiny, not because it works. In all fairness, it's not like there are product reviewers hiding behind the shelves at Target to warn you that a product might suck and so you make the best decision you can based on what's on the box.

Coffee grinder of doom

I needed a new coffee grinder. Normally I'd shop it on Amazon, but I had brand new beans from my Trader Joe's visit with Cranky and I *needed* that new grinder now. I recently used up the last of what I had the coffeehouse grind for me and only had some pre-ground autodrip crap that doesn't work well in a press. My old coffee grinder lasted me over 7 years and it was the crappy little proctor silex $13 thing. The grinder button broke on it years ago but I could still make it work with a paperclip (because I'm MacGuyver). So I went to Target yesterday and their cheapest grinders were all around $20. They had a very fancy looking one on SALE for $20, and I thought, "gee, if it's fancier and on sale for the same price as the average ones I must be getting a good deal" - also it was shiny. Of course, I came home to find that it had a 2 star rating on Amazon. Out of 41 customer reviews 27 were one star. Go fucking figure. At least in the reviews, someone who is more MacGuyver-y than me has come up with a solution to make a more even grind using a business card...yes, a business card. I had already ground my coffee this morning, and truthfully, it wasn't too bad. If you're using a French press, you want a more coarse grind anyway, and apparently that is the one thing this grinder can sort of grind evenly...even during my first cup here I haven't noticed that sometimes grittiness that can come from French Press coffee, so that's a good sign. We'll see how it holds up. It sure looks pretty on the counter top if nothing else.

And an important aside, the TJ's Sumatra is excellent.

Who knew that Jimmy Fallon was funny? I sure didn't, until I saw this:

"Neil Young" Covers the Fresh Prince

Here's the last of disc one of Live at Leeds. Track 11, Shakin' All Over, was loaded to the library a few days ago. Make sure you set aside a bit of time, that My Generation track is over 15 minutes of Roger stuttering. Ok, that's not true, there's a lot of cool Tommy-esq jamming. Enjoy!

Have a good day, it's time for me to go get a Twin Peaks fix to go with my damn good coffee.

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Cold

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 09:29:12 -0500

It's cold out. Butt ass cold out. It's 6 degrees with a -12 windchill. Hello Adirondack winter! I also seem to have a cold. It's pretty mild so far. Not one of those painful sore throat and nose scab sort of deals...just a slight sore throat with a bit of congestion. I'm drinking my Yogi tea but will have to hit up the liquor store soon because I'm out of brandy. I'm all about the natural remedies. I believe my grandmother's was rum, but me and rum had a falling out a few years ago. So now it's all about the brandy. I'm not particularly fond of brandy, but you don't really want to use a liquor that you love or you'll associate it with being sick...Sort of why Campbell's chicken noodle soup makes me want to ralph just from smelling it.

Brandy (You're a Fine Girl)

Looking Glass

I'll use any excuse to put up a guilty pleasure song like Brandy. Look at all those mustaches...and that lovely neckerchief for the lady.

I have to finish up my shopping today. I dreamed last night that I was out and about getting it done, but all the stores turned off their lights at 5:30 so I was hunting around for fancy soaps in the dark. It was a little weird.

Just about finished with my Reservoir Dogs dvd. My favorite special feature was a hilarious tribute to Lawrence Tierney. Just a few weeks ago, Wil Wheaton, on his Memories of the Futurecast podcast, was talking about how scared EVERYONE was in the cast when Larry Tierney came on for a guest spot on TNG. Apparently they weren't alone.

Reservoir Dogs: A tribute to Lawrence Tierney 1/2

Reservoir Dogs: A tribute to Lawrence Tierney 2/2

And according to his Wiki page, he apparently scared the cast of Seinfeld too:

When he guest-starred on Seinfeld (1990) in "The Jacket" episode as Elaine's father, Alton Benes, he scared the cast so badly that they never had him back on. He stole a butcher knife from the set and hid it under his jacket. When Jerry Seinfeld confronted him about it (much to the dismay of the entire cast), Tierney made a stabbing motion towards him as in reference to the movie Psycho (1960).

I'll wrap this up with a little more of Leeds for all the Whos in Who-ville.

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Good Luck to the Barley Mow

nobody@vox.com(Valerae) — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 11:20:23 -0500

What is the difference between soup and stew? Anyone know? I made a chicken barley soup/stew yesterday that was a variation on my chicken noodle soup and it was souper (oy) yummy.

First I chopped some carrots and onions and minced a couple of cloves of garlic.

IMG_2556

I heated some olive oil in a dutch oven until it got shimmery and threw in the carrots for a minute...then I added the garlic and stirred it around for about 30 seconds and then added the onions for about another 30 seconds. I left everything in just long enough for it to release a bit of juices but not brown. You don't want to cook garlic for more than a minute either or it will burn, I just wanted to mellow the sharp garlic flavor.

IMG_2557

I then cheated and made broth with water and Better Than Bouillon, added a bunch of dried thyme, parsley and a bay leaf. I threw in three boneless, skinless chicken breasts which are expensive, but really easy and who doesn't love big chunks of white chicken meat in soup? I also threw in a half a cup of barley. Apparently barley's not just for beer anymore in this house.

IMG_2558

You'll note that I had to switch to a bigger stock pot because I ended up making more than I originally planned. After about 40 minutes of simmering, I took out the chicken and cut it into big chunks and popped it back in. Cooked it for another 15 minutes and viola!

IMG_2564

The difference between this and my chicken noodle is, well, I use noodles instead of barley, the noodle soup doesn't have garlic or thyme in it either, but instead I use dill.

The other night I made really awesome restaurant quality garlic mashed potatoes. I toasted the garlic in its skin for about 20 minutes over low heat while the potatoes were boiling. Then I removed it from heat, covered it and let it sit for ten minutes. It got really soft and I minced it and added it to the potatoes when I added the melted butter (butter before half & half). I added a ton of salt and pepper and a bit of rosemary. I wish I had fresh rosemary, that would have been perfect. They were amazing. I ate way too much, but they were really good.

Here's a bit more from Live at Leeds for the Who "fans" in the hood.

Oh, and in honor of the title of this post, I could at least put an entertaining version of Barley Mow from local Irish band, Hair of the Dog. This was probably recorded at the Parting Glass in Saratoga, a great little bar where I saw Vic Wooten the first time.

14 Barley Mow

Hair of the Dog

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